Just a few thoughts

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Sunday, May 27, 2012

Hold Your Fire!

*Covers face protectively*

So, I've been MIA for freaking ever, right? I know, I know, I suck lol. But, before you open fire, hear me out!

First of all, I'm currently right in the middle of that big transformational thing that I could feel coming for the past year or so (I don't know if I ever blogged about that, but I think I mentioned it on YouTube). Let's just say that I have been ass deep in shadow work and I think the reasons I've needed Hekate's presence in my life are being revealed, layer by layer. Once this particular "episode" (for lack of a better word) is over, or at least closer to being over, I'll fill you in on everything. For now, just let me say that there are HUGE changes occurring in my everyday and spiritual life and my eyes have been opened to so much that I never knew existed, feared, or repressed.

Second, when it rains, it pours. I swear... First, my husband has car trouble. Then I have car trouble. Then our sink basically exploded (a pipe) and flooded about a third of our home, which took days to fix and nearly a week to figure out all the damages and get everything dried, etc. We've been totally rearranging our place, putting things in storage, sorting through junk, basically spring cleaning that should be classified as an Olympic sport. Then we started having electrical issues, and I'm having car trouble again. Those are just the highlights, there have been tons of other minor issues, but jeez it's been a crazy month.

I'm also basically getting "back to basics" with my path. I'm pretty much sweeping everything I know to one side and looking at things from a new perspective. If you have known about my...knack...for attracting the paranormal, as well as my childhood and teenage "gift" of seeing and hearing spirits, you may know that that is one thing I've seriously suppressed. For whatever reason, when I was about 15 I shoved it aside and refused to deal with it. I was sick of being a "freak" (in an area of my life that I couldn't really control, that is) and for some reason it started to scare me. Maybe it was my hyper religious family, maybe it was friends discouraging me, who knows? That's something I'm dealing with now. I've been feeling for a long time now (about 3 years) that my ability to communicate with the deceased was going to play an important role in my life, I just didn't (and don't) know how. So, I'm working on my "shadow" and getting to the bottom of things like that (as well as other issues I have).

Back to the "back to basics" thing... I'm basically going to do a personalized "year and a day" type program of study, but I'm thinking it's going to go from midsummer to Samhain, roughly. I'll be delving into a few subjects I either want to learn about, or want to learn more about, as well  as reconnecting with my spiritual side. Spiritually, I've been very "stuck" lately. I haven't been making time to connect with nature and my spirituality in general, and it's really weighing on me now.

So, if anyone else is feeling a bit stagnant lately and wants to join me, let me know! We don't have to study the same things, but we could sort of act as "spiritual buddies" and check in, share what we're learning, suggest books, etc.

Ok, you're up to date on why I've been MIA! I wanted to check in and let you all know that I'm not disappearing for good, I'm just in the middle of something right now, but I'll try to start posting more again.

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